Influence, You Say?

Just learned a few things that are tweaking my brain a bit.  Let me set the stage:

(Acts 13:1-3) In the church at Antioch there were prophets and teachers: Barnabas, Simeon called Niger, Lucius of Cyrene, Manaen (who had been brought up with Herod the tetrarch) and Saul. While they were worshiping the Lord and fasting, the Holy Spirit said, "Set apart for me Barnabas and Saul for the work to which I have called them." So after they had fasted and prayed, they placed their hands on them and sent them off.  (NIV)

After visiting and preaching a few places, the two missionaries came to Pisidian Antioch and entered the synagogue, sat down, and were invited to speak.   Paul (Saul) summarized over 450 years of history up to his present time and challenged the listeners with this statement:

(Acts 13:39-41)"Therefore, my brothers, I want you to know that through Jesus the forgiveness of sins is proclaimed to you. Through him everyone who believes is justified from everything you could not be justified from by the law of Moses. Take care that what the prophets have said does not happen to you: "'Look, you scoffers, wonder and perish, for I am going to do something in your days that you would never believe, even if someone told you.'"

The two were invited to come back again the next sabbath and speak.  And here is what happened:

(Acts 13:44-45) On the next Sabbath almost the whole city gathered to hear the word of the Lord. When the Jews saw the crowds, they were filled with jealousy and talked abusively against what Paul was saying.  (NIV)

Paul and Barnabas answered them boldly and this was the result:

(Acts 13:49-50) The word of the Lord spread through the whole region. But the Jews incited the God-fearing women of high standing and the leading men of the city. They stirred up persecution against Paul and Barnabas, and expelled them from their region.  (NIV)

The thing that really stood out to me is the amazing influence women have.   Read these verses again:

(Acts 13:49-50) The word of the Lord spread through the whole region. But the Jews incited the God-fearing women of high standing and the leading men of the city. They stirred up persecution against Paul and Barnabas, and expelled them from their region.  (NIV) 

Who were incited?  Who were the go-to people when the jealous Jews wanted to get something done?  The God-fearing women of high standing and the leading men, you say?   So, that tells me a lot about the kind of influence we women have.  I mean, this society that we are talking about is not modern day USA.  It is not a society that revered the opinion of women from what I understand.  But these women were able to stir up enough persecution to have Paul and Barnabas expelled. They had influence in their families and used it to make something happen. Wow.  We as women have influence, whether we know it or not.  The question to ask is, "Where I am using this gift of influence?" 

What is on Your Face?

One of my friends who is a missionary in Mexico shared this gem through a blog:

"It was wonderful to just sit, relax, and talk about things.  As we were getting ready to leave, a gentleman approached my husband first to ask if we were done with our table and second to tell Mike what joy he saw on Mike’s face.  He shared that he had been watching Mike and I while he was in line to order and get his coffee. He said he rarely sees people as happy and full of joy as we looked.  What a complement!! Especially to know that a stranger can notice the Joy of the Lord in our life just by observing us in an everyday situation. 
This has prompted us to think about “What is on your face?”  What do we put off every day, especially when we are not thinking about what others might see?  This led Mike and I to discuss what we really want others to see in us, especially when we may be in trials: that is we have the Joy of the Lord in our life."  - Heidi Van Dyken

Good question!  We can't even try to produce that joy, but as we live and work in Christ, it just comes out.  Pondering this today.  Here's to spreading the joy!

Learning Contentment

So, how does one learn to be content?  There is only one good answer...and one good way.  

The last few months, I have had to stay home.  I mean really stay home.  I was having tummy issues.  No, not those kinds of tummy issues.  The kind of tummy issues that just about knocked me to my knees.  Every single time I ate, my stomach felt like someone had hit me, hard.  I got nauseated, felt burning sensations, felt like I had been hit.  I can still reproduce the feeling if I eat fatty foods...which I now try to avoid at all costs.  (Because I did yesterday...ate fatty foods...and today, oh my, I am feeling like someone gave me a nice punch to my gut.)

The doctor who is helping me sort out all the tummy troubles, bless his heart, figures there are several things happening.  But he was kind enough to rule out cancer, and for that I am thankful.  I have stopped taking my acid reflux medication as it was making things worse; have taken anti-parasitical medication and now have more energy; and have had to remove most stress in my life (if that is possible!)  I have also been asked to not add anything new to my plate or pick up any old out-of-the-house activities for about six months.  The hope is that we will not have to remove my gall bladder and can reverse damage that an always-on-the-go lifestyle has wreaked on my digestive tract.

Needless to say, it can sometimes be hard to remain content and to stay where I know God wants me to stay.  Now, don't get me wrong.  I have plenty to do.  I am learning the fine art of reorganizing, or shall I say organizing, my home.  I am spending time home schooling my littlest.  I am helping teach my older boys a bible study and disciple them, and just be there for them. I am a welcoming committee of one to my wonderful man when he comes home. I am a prayer warrior for friends.  I am seeing incredible fruit just from doing that.  And it is good.

But then that temptation to be discontent washes over me.  I think it is a mighty battle within.  I went to church today and there was a ministry fair.  And to tell you the truth, I wanted to run around and sign up for all the ministries, just so I could tell others about the wonderful things God has been teaching me in my bible study time at home.

Oh, wait.   At home.  Where am I learning all this wonderful stuff?  Right where God has me.  At home.  Oh yeah.  (Pause here and contemplate this with me.)  

My Pastor talked of getting my game shirt on today and getting in the game.  I so badly wanted to throw on that shirt, and yell, "Put me in Coach!  I can do it!".  You see, I keep forgetting there is a time for everything -- a season.  And it is the off season for me right now.  It is the time when I am supposed to be training, and practicing.  God makes that pretty clear to me in my study.  But I keep looking forward to that big game.  I want to feel the three pointer slide off my fingers and swoosh through the rim.  I want to be part of the camaraderie of working hard side by side.

But then again, I remember what God says about obedience.  And once again, I am humbled.  My training is right here at home.  And there is only one way for me to learn to be content...and that is to be content right where God has me.  That is my training- my training for the big game.  Right now I am working on contentment.

Expectation or Expectancy

I am discovering there is a difference between expectation and expectancy leadership.  And that realization makes all the difference in the world to me.  Let me explain.

I have loathed the expectation kind of leadership all of my life.  And I know I have a donkey kind of attitude when I see that kind of leadership.  (Seriously!  I would like to bray and kick the expectation leader between the eyes!)  Expectation leadership places a yoke around a person's neck.  Some one who uses expectation leadership expects one to get things done-- expects one to do what is right -- expects one to PERFORM.  Expectation leadership breeds performance based acceptance.  Sometimes I call it legalism.  Sometimes I call it snobbery.   And sometimes I even do it to myself -- you know, get down on myself for not being able to do what I think I should be able to do.  It always stems from self focus in whoever employs it...and is wholly undesirable.   

Expectancy leadership is a whole other brand of leadership.  I think it is the kind of leadership Christ used.  Certain people exemplify an expectancy kind of leadership.  Of course they expect you to show up.  Of course they expect you to get things done.  The difference is they do not condemn you when you are unable to do it all.  They make you feel welcome and they are genuinely happy you are there.  That kind of leadership makes you want to get stuff done.  Matt Jolley uses this kind of leadership.  I loved working for him and trusted him to do the right thing.  My husband, Jeff, also uses this kind of leadership.  I love being around him.

I finally realized this morning why there are certain people that I do not want to spend time with.  They have expectations for me.  They want me to fit into their mold of how they think I should be.  And they make me feel condemned when I cannot do what they think I should be doing.  But God broke the mold on each of us and gave each of us different talents and abilities.  No two of us are alike.  We may have some of the same talents, abilities, and gifts.  But we will never be alike.

Conversely, I realized that I have expectations for them.  I expect them to see things the way that I do.  I expect them to just enjoy me for who God made me to be. And, most humbling of all, I realized I condemn them if they put expectations on me. 

I want that to change in me.  I want to enjoy others for who they are.  I want to care for them and encourage them to keep looking to Christ and to keep walking the path Christ is leading them on.

I also want to know God so well, that when others try to put their expectation brand of leadership on me, and expect me to be what they think I should be, I can smile, encourage them, and pray they are open to allowing God to work in them as well. 

Lord, help me to utilize expectancy.  Help me to not make others feel condemned when they do not do what I "expect" them to do.   Give me your love for others, not my kind of love.  Remove the pride in my life that makes me think others have to act a certain way for me to care about them.  Lord, humble me.

Fortresses

As of late I have been studying the Beth Moore book, Breaking Free.  This week's chapter, "The Steadfast Mind," has dealt specifically with tearing down the areas in our minds that tend to keep us captive -- the fortresses if you will.  We all have them.  Sometimes we think we are not good enough, or maybe even sometimes we think too highly of ourselves.  Whatever they are, they are that deep inside spot that no one wants to reveal to anyone -- the spot that affects what we think and do and how we react to situations.  Beth Moore spent a lot of time talking about Second Corinthians 10:4-5 and how we get rid of those fortresses.  "The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds.  We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ." (2 Cor 10:5 NIV) 

You're probably thinking what I thought at first.  "Huh?  What?  How do we do that?"  Well, without taking you through a whole week of study, let me just say Beth Moore does a terrific job of explaining it all.  The reason I write about this is because Jeff and I discussed all of what she was talking about in the study last night before going to sleep.  This morning we sat down to spend some time encouraging our boys, cracked open the devotional, Sparkling Gems from the Greek, and laughed out loud at the subject matter.  "Fortresses in Your Brain," was the title and the verse Rick Renner chose to talk about on December 1 was...you guessed it...Second Corinthians 10:4 (refer to the verses above).


We got an extra shot in the arm today, straight from God above.  I love how He does that.  "No really, Karen.  I want you to think about this.  I mean REALLY think about it.  Meditate on it.  Get what I am trying to tell you."  God is so good that way.  So, if you feel like a good read, here is what Rick Renner had to say about  Second Corinthians 10:4:

Break My ♥ for What Breaks Yours

A friend wrote this about a young man who decided life was not worth living anymore.

"I remember...When you would sit there and try to help me memorize my lines..♥ When you would text me and tell me not to forget ♥ When i would be sitting by myself and you would be the first one to be there to talk to me ♥ When we would talk about life ♥ When you would bring me up when i was down♥ when i would run over to you saying i want a picture of your handsome face ♥ when you told me not to let the little things get to me ♥ Your voice ♥ The way you would smile when you sang a funny song.. How you were all around a sweet person and so kind. ♥ I remember telling you i love you and you would respond♥ I remember you ♥ and i always will..Your in my heart Zac, i hope one day we meet again ♥ Rest In Peace♥"

So much to live for.  Oh, the deception.  My heart breaks.

Whatever is προσφιλής (Lovely)

Life is slowing down for me (in a sense).  I am staying closer to home these days.  Seems I have a tummy issue.  What's that issue, you say?  Well, it hurts and I get nauseated and coffee is a big no-no.  So, as I go through coffee withdrawals (oh boy), I will spend more time getting things taken care of at home.  But that is not all bad -- I have been feeling drawn to home for a long time. 

So, yes, I have had an ultrasound and it doesn't seem to indicate gall bladder issues other than my gall bladder is a little distended.  So, no, I don't know what is wrong.  An ulcer?  Who knows?  But God knows and I am going to rest in that.

God knows.  That is one of those thoughts that I get to meditate on.  I am learning what it means to, "think about such things things."  You know, Philippians 4:8: 

"Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable-- if anything is excellent or praiseworthy-- think about such things."

My friend Beth reminded me of this verse today.  And I am going to cling to it, because the alternative is to think altogether yucky thoughts.  Cancer, ulcers, scar tissue from previous surgeries, never eating again....  See what I mean?  Going there is way too easy.  Therefore, I am determined to --  think about such things.

So, first off, I want to know what those words mean.
True:

1) true 

2) loving the truth, speaking the truth, truthful 

Noble:

1) august, venerable, reverend

2) to be venerated for character, honorable

     a) of persons

     b) of deeds 

Right:

righteous, observing divine laws

     a) in a wide sense, upright, righteous, virtuous, keeping the commands of God

1) innocent, faultless, guiltless

2) used of him whose way of thinking, feeling, and acting is wholly conformed to the will of God, and who therefore needs no rectification in the heart or life

     a) only Christ truly

3) approved of or acceptable of God

 Pure:

(a) "pure from every fault, immaculate," 2Cr 7:11 (AV, "clear"); Phl 4:8; 1Ti 5:22; Jam 3:17; 1Jo 3:3 (in all which the RV rendering is "pure"), and 1Pe 3:2, "chaste;

 Lovely:

1) acceptable, pleasing

 Admirable:

 primarily, "uttering words or sounds of good omen," then, "avoiding ill-omened words," and hence "fair-sounding," "of good report," is so rendered in Phl 4:8.

Excellent:

(2) any particular moral excellence, as modesty, purity

Praiseworthy:

It means what you think it means. (((smile)))

That is a lot to chew on.  A lot to think about.  That ought to keep me busy for a while.  Don't be surprised if I practice this kind of thinking on you!

A Newly Hatched Chic(k)

Been sick the last few days with the crud.  Not sick enough to want to stay home from my last BCF class...but sick enough to send me to bed for a couple of days afterwards.  Today...with my hair stringy, my back tired from resting, and my muscles crying out to be used again...I feel like a newly hatched chick.  Being knocked off of my normally active feet into my bed feels a lot to me like how a chick must feel trapped in an egg.  As you probably already know, a chick uses it's little beak to poke a hole through it's shell and carve perforations all around the inside of the egg.  Then with a few mighty pushes, it breaks the shell in half and emerges.  The little chick uses most of its energy just to break free from its entrapment and lays in a heap - exhausted, wet, and weak.  That's how I am after an illness knocks me off my feet. Every part of me aches a bit just from the exertion my body has been putting forth to rid me of the illness that has entrapped me.  But then a new hope dawns....somehow the beautiful miracle of healing happens inside my body and the illness starts to retreat...the shell falls away.  Somehow in that moment the day seems a little brighter and the little hope of being free from the encumbrance starts to grow and multiply until I recognize that I going to make it.  The illness will not take over this time.  All I have to do now is slowly start to get up, slowly flex my muscles, and before I know it I will be on my feet again...running and learning to fly.

The more I walk with God, the more I am realizing that my spiritual journey is the same way.  My adult life has been filled with changes and challenges.  Jeff and I have moved more times than I care to count anymore.  I've experienced the joy of meeting kindred spirits wherever I have gone, only to find out that I must steel my self once again for the pain that comes from leaving...and being forgotten.  I now realize that over the years I have learned to build a shell around myself each time I have moved.  It's a necessary barrier in order to be protected from bumps and bruises that inevitably come from being "laid" in a new place...a new nest.  After the initial incubation time, I start to poke and peck my way out of the protective barrier that also entraps me.  I emerge feeling exhausted and spent from the effort of the journey.  Somehow, I sense that people want me to be excited about where I have hatched, so I try to stand in my own strength, only to fall back down.  I try once again to get up, grumbling and complaining and focusing on where I am, and again I fall.  I cannot succeed in my own strength.  It is not until I realize that I am fragile,  a newborn baby bird unable to protect myself, that I cry out to my God, as deep cries out to deep.  Then He scoops me up in His firm strong hand, dries the sweat of exertion off, and breathes life into my nostrils.  Only then do I realize that it was He who put the protective barrier about me, who caused me to be entrapped by His love in order to bring me to a new nest so that I can emerge and learn to stand, to grow, and to soar on His wings of love. 

Why do you say, O Jacob, and assert, O Israel, "My way is hidden from the LORD, And the justice due me escapes the notice of my God"? Do you not know? Have you not heard? The Everlasting God, the LORD, the Creator of the ends of the earth Does not become weary or tired. His understanding is inscrutable. He gives strength to the weary, And to him who lacks might He increases power. Though youths grow weary and tired, And vigorous young men stumble badly, Yet those who wait for the LORD Will gain new strength; They will mount up with wings like eagles, They will run and not get tired, They will walk and not become weary. (Isaiah 40:27-31 NASB)

As Always

As always, I have been reminded that I am not perfect. I tried my hand at home decorating again today. The results were not so bad. I placed some vinyl wall art on my wall today. A friend suggested I put it on a board and hang it so that when I paint my walls, I can just rehang it. But it was kind of big and I was kind of impatient, so I just put it on the wall and will remove it when I paint. I am thinking perhaps I should've listened to her! It turned out a little slanted. Not bad. And most people wouldn't notice. But I did! So, I rearranged the candle holders next to it with Jeff and Jacob's help, and now it is not so bad.  

I am so thankful that I do not have to be perfect.  I am so thankful that my imperfections are covered by the One who saved me from what I really deserve!  Thank you God for always reminding me how much I need and want you in my life! 

By the way...there are quite a few nail holes in my wall that I now need to fill from rearranging the candle holders.  Once again...that is why I love working on the computer so much.  I can drag, drop, reposition, resize, and undo and there are never any holes in my computer screen!


 

It's a New Day!

I am so glad that I get a new day...everyday!  The pressures and trials just seem to melt away.  Oh, sure, they are still lurking in the shadows and will come out to bite if I focus on them.  But I am going to choose to focus on the good, the clean, the pure, and the powerful! What a joy it is the have that choice!

A New Habit

I woke up today feeling overwhelmed.  Not just for me personally, but for those I am in contact with near and far.  Worldwise there was a devastating earthquake.  Closer to me still is one who lost photos in a hard drive crash; one whose father is in his last days; one who lost two family members; one who is in need of legal help; one who is in need of a job; one who is traveling; one who procrastinated and is feeling the consequences; children in need of direction; a household in need of attention; finances to be figured out; and a job to be found.  My former habit was just to get mad.  Not mad at any one thing or person in particular, but mad at it all.  I guess it seemed to help me steam through what needed to be done...but left me feeling exhausted and affected those around me. 

But today is a new day...I will not give into the temptation to get angry or to despair when things all seem to be falling apart.  1Corinthians 10:13 says, "No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it." 

A new habit gets to be formed today.  A new understanding.  In the midst of all the pressures of life, I still can hold onto the One who is my rock, my fortress, my deliverer.  Habits are a hard thing to break.  I am so thankful that I do not have to do it in my own strength.  I just have to lay aside the old habit as if I am laying aside an old piece of clothing.  The old habit is corrupted, it never worked.  Time to go shopping for a new piece of clothing and I know just where to find it - the perfect store!  And I have a gift card!  The price has already been paid.  All I have to do is sift through and pick out the perfect piece of clothing.  The one I chose has the name of prayer. And it also has a some wonderful accessories called trust and obedience.  There, put those on and my feet are ready for action! Interestingly, I already know that this new garment feels a little stiff. But as I continue to wear it and it gets washed and dried and used it will become like my favorite pair of jeans.  It's the perfect fit!  Thank you, God!

Unfailing Love
You have my heart
and I am yours forever
You are my strength
God of grace and power
And ev'rything You hold in Your hand
Still You make time for me
I can't understand

So I praise You God of earth and sky
How beautiful is your unfailing love unfailing love
And You never change God you remain
The Holy One and my unfailing love unfailing love

You are my rock
The One I hold on to
You are my song
And I sing for you
And ev'rything
You hold in Your hand
Still you make time for me
I can't understand

Words and Music by Chris Tomlin, Cary Pierce and Ed Cash